No Fuss, No Muss: Clark Bars


Bart: Check the authenticator spot.
Authenticator Spot: This is an authentic Hullabalooza ticket. For authentic refreshment, eat Clark bars and for totally outrageous class rings, it’s Jostens. Go, Jostens!
– Homerpalooza 

The Simpsons | Season 7 - Episode 24

Clark Bars are not available to purchase in Canada. Luckily for you, dear reader, I’ve got some friends on the “inside”. And by that I mean I know some Americans who occasionally provide me with the sweet, sweet candy I need to make this blog happen. Given that trying Clark Bars was a reader request (side note: I do plan to make ALL reader requests by the year 2030) I had to put in another American food request.

I am a big fan of chocolate and peanut butter, so I actually wish I could buy Clark Bars in Canada. I definitely would! Of course, there aren’t any other peanut butter and chocolate candy bars associated with The Simpsons. So there’s not really anything I have to add related to that particular topic…

Fun fact: Clark Bars (and Jostens too) are legit old-timey businesses that have both been around for over 100 years. I can see how an event like Hullabalooza would be sponsored by such upstanding companies. Especially given their stellar record for providing quality vet care for all their freaks.

Cromulence: 8 Smiling Politelys out of 10

No Fuss, No Muss Clark Bars From: Homerpalooza (The Simpsons Season 7 – Episode 24)

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EatslikeaduckPatrick EhlandGlenn S. Recent comment authors
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Patrick Ehland
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Clark Bars! From my hometown of Yinzburgh, PA! I’m glad you found them quite cromulent.

Eatslikeaduck
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I felt embiggened right after eating them!

Glenn S.
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Glenn S.

I don’t know if Bart would agree with you on your “lack of any other peanut butter and chocolate bars associated with The Simpsons” comment.

Eatslikeaduck
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Perhaps, as Rainier Wolfcastle would say, “that’s the Joke”.