Creamed Eels, Corn Nog and Wadded Beef
Marge: Oh, there’s so little left. Creamed Eels? Corn Nog? Wadded Beef?
Lisa: Mom, let’s just grab what we can and get out of here. This storm is making people crazy.
Mrs. Glick: The last pineapple! And plenty ripe too!
Lisa: But I’m not fruit! I’m a kid!
Mrs. Glick: That’s what the pumpkin said.
Ralph: Hi, Lisa. We’re going to be in a pie!
– Hurricane Neddy
The Simpsons | Season 8 - Episode 8
As mentioned in my previous post, now that we’re all isolated and weird I am going to have to start making some Imagination Recipes. And to me, the perfect place to start is with those scant few Kwik-E-Mart items available to Marge and Lisa during The Simpsons episode Hurricane Neddy. For reference those items are: Creamed Eels, Corn Nog and Wadded Beef. I’m going to imagine how you could go about making each item, without actually making them. You don’t like it? Send me some fresh eel meat and I’ll see what I can do.
- One eel, skinned and deboned (do you find something funny about the word deboned?)
- 1/2 onion
- 2 tablespoons butter
- 3/4 cup heavy cream
- 3/4 cup milk
- Salt and pepper to taste
Combine onion and butter and cook over medium heat until the onion is translucent, about 5 minutes. Add chopped eel and mix well. Add in milk and cream. Stir over medium heat until mixture comes to a gentle boil and thickens, about 5-10 minutes, stirring constantly. Season with salt and pepper. Allow to cool before eating. Or throw it away, your call.
- 1 cups of sweet corn (peaches and cream)
- 1 cup sugar
- 2 cups whole milk
- 2 tablespoons vanilla extract
- 1 cups heavy whipping cream
In a saucepan, add 1 (of 2) cups of milk and sugar and warm over low heat, do NOT boil. While the milk warms, place corn and remaining cup of milk into a blender. Blend until a smooth puree is achieved. Add corn mixture to the warmed milk and sugar and bring up to temperature and simmer for around 15 minutes. Allow mixture to cool and then add vanilla extract. Beat heavy whipping cream until soft peaks form. Once the corn milk is fully cooled, whisk in the whipping cream until just combined. Do not over beat this mixture. Serve immediately. Or throw at someone who isn’t social distancing.
- Various cuts of beef (I guess?)
Wad various beef cuts together into a mixture that will fit tightly inside of a can. Once it’s something a cow would enjoy, I guess that means it’s ready. Don’t actually put this in a can. Also, probably best not to actually put this in your mouth.
And, if you don’t like any of the recipes provided (and really, why wouldn’t you like the suggestion for creamed eels??) you can always count on…