SBLOUNSKCHED! Bar from Homestar Runner

Ah, the early 2000s when flash animation was rampant across the internet, AOL instant messenger was something people actually used, and Facebook only existed for a select few college students. As fascinating as AOL and old-timey Facebook are, today I want to focus on one of my personal favourite flash animation series: Homestar Runner, specifically Strong Bad, even more specifically the SBLOUNSKCHED! Bar.

If you’re not familiar with Strong Bad, the premise for each episode was that he would respond to emails and, well, that was pretty much it. Usually the video was funny or at least vaguely amusing. Hey, what more can you expect from less than five minutes of content at a time?

In Email #149 he’s asked “are you famous, popular, and chick-magnet enough to have a candy product.” With the answer, of course, being yes. Now some aspects of creating the SBLOUNSKCHED! Bar seemed a little above my cooking knowledge. Here’s the official ingredient list:

  • Gaseous cloud of marshmallow vapor
  • Globules of semi-solid licorice colloid
  • Channel of liquid nougat
  • Crispety cookety log
  • Rich, creamy pepperoni
  • Tiny bowls of crispy puffed rice cereal (with tiny spoons)
  • Boring Brown Chocolate (BBC)

And here’s what I actually used…


  • Marshmallows (solid, not vapor)
  • Black licorice (solid, not colloid)
  • Nougat (solid, not liquid)
  • Cookie dough
  • Rich, creamy pepperoni
  • Puffed rice cereal (no tiny bowls or spoons)
  • Boring Brown Chocolate


Smush marshmallow and black licorice together. Next, wrap with soft nougat and then wrap that with cookie dough. Place rich, creamy pepperoni on top. Sprinkle puffed rice cereal on top of the pepperoni. Finally, coat everything with boring brown chocolate.


Oh yes, I also forgot to mention that I wouldn’t be shaping this thing into pants. It was difficult enough just getting all the components to stay together in some kind of log shape. I have no idea how I would have made this monstrosity look like pants on top of that. 


Anyway, the SBLOUNSKCHED! Bar tasted…weird. I’m sure it won’t surprise you to know that the pepperoni was what really made this extra special. And not in a good way. I love pepperoni and I love weird candy all mashed together. I’m not really a fan of combining those things and then covering them with chocolate.

Cromulence: 5 YSK’s Turned Out Alright out of 10

SBLOUNSKCHED! Bar from: Homestar Runner – Strong Bad Email #149: Candy Product





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Prince Perot

Awww bless your heart, you didn’t HAVE to go the the extra mile and use actual pepperoni haha! One trick that my family used to use for pizza-shaped cookie cakes is to cut out little circles or red Fruit Roll-Up. I’m not sure that would’ve made this bar GOOD, but I can only imagine leagues better than having to combine actual beef with various sweets.


How about Bronco Trolleys?

Probably too easy for your site, but it would taste good.


It takes 16 to get fat, and I think you eat the orange rind but I’m not sure.


Did you know Strong Bad wrote a children’s book? It is pretty good. Also, WELCOME BACK!



Glenn S.

No pictures of your completed work? I have to say that’s a bit disappointing. Anyways. Holy hell yes! Homestarrunner was the best during those middle and high school years of mine and I’m happy that you’re doing stuff for that here. And while I understand the not being able to shape it into pants and implement a built in bite out of them for security (who would want to steal a half eaten pair of choco pants) It sucks that you made it into a log shape or as Strong Bad would put it “piece of crap shape” (talkin bout… Read more »

Glenn S.

Oh lord those pictures are making my “piece of crap shape” point for me. I mean, I mean my god that looks disgusting.
And one more thing. I hope you don’t end up going mad with power at some point and try to eat The Chort.

Matthew Morelli

Do something from SpongeBob next


basically anything from this episode: SpongeBob SquarePants S11 E51 – E52 – The Night Patty

Matthew Morelli

btw its not spongebob but one persistent suggestion from someone I show this blog to is the car panini from the Family Guy episode Saturated Fat Guy


Boil it